Today I want to confess what has kept me from writing a blog post for a whole week! And it’s even holding my back from writing this post right now!
I’m a perfectionist!
I’m a perfectionist and I have re-written this paragraph at least three times. Then decided none of the versions were any good and wrote this instead!!
How being a perfectionist affected me this week.
Since I began my psychology PhD 10 months ago I have known that I have to write the introductory chapter of my thesis for the start of September. But I didn’t start writing it properly until last week (the middle of August)! I have piles and piles of notes. And I have written a draft of a journal paper based on my first study so I obviously know a lot about the subject. But I just felt like I couldn’t start writing the chapter of my thesis because I couldn’t do it well enough. As a perfectionist I just don’t want to settle and hand in something that’s just ‘okay’. So I have been working long hours last week to try and finish my thesis chapter for the deadline, which meant I have had no time for blogging!
My thoughts on being a perfectionist.
I think that being a perfectionist has benefitted me because it has pushed me to get good grades and do well in my academic work so that I was accepted for the PhD. But it’s also held me back and caused me problems, because what does a perfectionist do when they don’t think they can do something perfectly? They don’t do it at all or they get annoyed, they get upset, they cry. Well I cry… a lot. And on reflection all of the worrying and crying just isn’t worth it because it’s okay not to be perfect!
Today’s issues with being a perfectionist
- Re-drafting the title several times. From ‘Confessions of a health blogger & why it’s okay not to be perfect’ to ‘ confessions of a health blogger and being perfectly imperfect’ and a whole range of other things!
- Re-drafting whole paragraphs and spending well over 40 minutes changing the order of words! How some people say they write a blog in under half an hour I don’t know!
- Getting my boyfriend to read the draft because this post is a bit out of my comfort zone and not my usual smoothie bowls or healthy dessert recipes.
- Not knowing what picture to put with this post!! I wanted to use this picture of some strawberries on soya yogurt I took the other day. I used the strawberries purely because they aren’t ‘perfect’, but then that doesn’t really have anything to do with the other theme of the post which is about studying… but I don’t have any photos saved on my computer that do have that theme!! Big dilemma.
So there you have it. My confession about why you haven’t heard from me in a week!
Are you a perfectionist? How has it affected you?